It's been 6 years!

Saturday, November 11, 2006.
There was a flurry of activity in the room that morning as my bridesmaids helped me get ready. We heard a knock and were all surprised to see my groom poke his head around the door. "Shuggy!!!", I squealed with excitement, dropping everything and making a beeline for the door. The girls tried to shoo him away, insisting that he was not supposed to see the bride before the ceremony. Paying them no mind, I ran into his arms and as he held me, I closed my eyes and said a quick thank you to God. My heart was filled with joy and gratitude. They teased us and we laughed. That was the beginning.

I knew my life would change when I said my vows that day. What I didn't know, was how significant that change would be.

Sunday, November 11, 2012.
It's been six years.

We started this journey in a tiny apartment, our mattress on the floor, watching bootleg copies of Lost and Grey's Anatomy, because we couldn't afford a bed or cable TV. The AC we inherited from the previous tenants helped keep things cozy, perfect weather for getting to "know" each other. Good times!

We've had good days. Lots of them. We've seen our dreams become reality. Our goals and projections have not only been met, they've been exceeded. We've seen God come through for us time and again. God has been kind to us. We couldn't have done it without Him.

We've had bad days. Times when giving up seemed like a better option. Days when love became a choice, a tough one, because the feeling was just not there.

We have made it through the storms, surviving love's ebb and flow. We have laughed and cried together. We've evolved and grown together. We have made memories together. As I look back on the past six years, my heart is filled with gratitude to God.

I'm grateful for all His blessings, especially the ones that money cannot buy.

I am grateful for the opportunity to walk this journey with you Adebola, the love of my life and the life that I love. My booboookins. All round great guy, steady proving to me that there is a God. Putting up with my skoin skoin issues. Keeping my heart tender. Letting me thrive. When I count my blessings, I count you twice. Olowo ori mi. Nwoke e ji eje mba. I celebrate you.

I'm grateful for Nathan Ademide, Alexis Ademidun and David Ademidara, the children God gave us. If God's blessings were earned, I would not qualify.

Moshopef'OluwanitoriwipeOsh'orenlafunmi. If I had a thousand tongues  they would not be enough.

I have no idea what the future holds. Truth be told, I am afraid sometimes. What if...? To keep fear at bay, I keep reminding myself of the scripture God gave me in the beginning

"There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear..."                             1 John 4:18 

The truth is that in life, there are no guarantees.
Life happens and there will always be things that are beyond my control. I have the option of refusing to maximize my life by living in fear, or  choosing to make the best of what God has given me, trusting Him to perfect what He has started.

I look forward to the future holding firmly unto this promise:
"Being confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ"    Philippians 1:6 

Thanks for coming by again and again.
May your dreams come true.
xxx

365 days since my Lil' Miracle arrived :)

"Hello, is that Geebeemislowah" The voice on the phone asked. Hearing my name distorted like that is something I've gotten used to, so I replied, "You mean Gbemisola? Yeah, that's me."

"I'm calling from the lab with your test results" she explained. "Congratulations, you're pregnant!"

WHAT??!!

"What?!" I shouted, "that is sooooo not possible! There's no way I can be pregnant"
"Well you are, congratulations again" she said, as she got off the phone.

That, my friends, was how I found out I was expecting a baby on my birthday last year.

To say that I was shocked is an understatement. I couldn't believe it. It took a while for me to wrap my mind around the fact that I was pregnant. I was sad :(

Yes. Sad. Very Sad.

*insert long story here*

I know I've promised to share this story before, but let me confess, I've been unable to bring myself to write it because it requires dredging up memories of a really dark period in my life. This girl is a coward. I'll give it a shot soon. Today? Tomorrow? The honest to goodness truth is that I don't know.

Suffice it to say, that the time between March, when I found out I was pregnant, and October, when I gave birth, was the most trying period of my entire life.Thankfully, God brought me through.

This scripture is my testimony:

"...Weeping may endure for a night,

But joy comes in the morning."

I went through all of that for a reason and even though I don't fully get it yet, I know that I wouldn't have experienced God the way I did if I didn't go through all I did. GOD IS FAITHFUL.

It's hard to remember all those dark days right now, because Joy has indeed come.When I hear David laugh, I wonder how I could ever have told God I didn't want to be pregnant. David is such a delightful child. There is NO way I could have earned such an AMAZING blessing from God. As he turns one today, my heart is filled with gratitude to God that He gave me David Ademidara MomoreOluwa, My Lil' Miracle.

What life lessons could Humpty Dumpty possibly teach me?!

The frenzied rush to get everyone ready and off to school has become our new normal these days. We had one of the not-so-crazy days last week. Everyone was in a good mood and we were all singing, Nathan using the chance to show off some of the rhymes he's learned in his new school. I didn't know a lot of them, so I would chop mouth ad lib, and then sing really loud when he sang one I knew. When we got to Humpty Dumpty, I was like, yeah, I know that one and we sang the version I knew:

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall,
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
All the king's horses and all the king's men
Couldn't put Humpty Dumpty together again.

Then Nathan sang this version that I had never heard before and I was blown away! Not because I didn't know the words, but because of the lesson in it for me. Nathan was preaching to me!!  

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall,

Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.

Humpty Dumpty knew what to do,

He fixed himself with tape and glue.

I was like, "What did you say?!"

It was a light-bulb moment for me. Humpty Dumpty did what?!

Humpty Dumpty rewrote his story.

He accepted responsibility for his own life.

He didn't accept the verdict of the kings men as final.

He fixed himself. He did something about his life. He may not have looked pretty, all taped up, but he was fixed. He was no longer the victim. He...

I could go on and on, but you get it.

I made a recording of him singing it that morning. You can view it on my youtube channel. I couldn't stop thinking about it and on our way to church on Sunday, they kept singing it.

When we got home, I got a chance to make a better video. They wouldn't stand still, but of course, after I promised to bribe them with give them ice cream, they co-operated :)

Here's the video.

Like the bible says... "Out of the mouth of babes and sucklings..."

Thanks for coming by again and again.
May your dreams come true
xxx

Friends and fun at The Rub :)

It was a few days to my wedding when I got a call from my friend, Deji. He wanted to find out how things were going and if I needed anything. I thanked him and said everything was fine and then he asked what car I was going to ride in to church. Shocked that I was seriously considering riding in "Funmileyi", my faithful rugged Nissan Sunny, he offered me the use of his car he had just bought. He wasn't going to let me get away with another of my crazy schemes... Bride driving her self to church? Maybe in the movies, but not in Lagos.

I was pleasantly surprised by his thoughtfulness. Preparing for my wedding without my parents had taught me that the only One I could really count on was God. Life had shocked me into growing up. Taking care of myself without asking for help quickly become a lifestyle. Deji's kind gesture meant a lot to me particularly because it was his idea, not mine. I have been told that I give off a vibe that suggests I don't need help, perhaps that's why I don't get people offering to help me often. That's fine, I don't have a sense of entitlement. I also don't like waiting around hoping to be rescued. If I want something done, I do it. On the rare occasion that someone not only anticipates my need, but also attempts to help me meet it, I really really appreciate it and I do not take it for granted. It's the little things make my heart smile. I don't forget.

He's in town for a course and we got a chance to hang out last week Friday. We had fun, reminiscing about old times as we laughed and talked over dinner. His wife, Yinka, and I are best of friends. She was one of my bridesmaids and she's extra special because we were born on the exact same day :). We've all come a long way since our Daystar singles fellowship days and God has been kind to us.

We found this really cool restaurant, Jonathan's The Rub, tucked in a cozy little corner and we had a good time. The food was really good, catching up and spending time together was even better. Fun times :)

The Lobster Taco was really good! By far the bestest Taco I have ever had.

I had the Red Snapper Santa Cruz served with a side of  Mac and  5 cheeses. Words . Cannot. Describe.

 Jonathan's The Rub gets 10/10. We're definitely going back.

 I'm going to keep being nice by bringing you more pictures of food ;) If your tummy rumbles, that's a signal for you to say a prayer for me. Hehehe. Pray! Pray for your sister... lolzzz

Thanks for coming by again and again.
May your dreams come true.
xxx

Of forgiveness, Chicken Lollipops and Bacon Wrapped Chicken.

Once in a while, you come across a blog that inspires you.

That's the effect Sabirah's blog has on me. Her post about forgiveness made me think deeply. It's hard to believe that she's so young. I admire her.

I found this picture of Chicken Lollipops she put up. Yummy.  

source

Reminds me of one of my new discoveries, Bacon wrapped Chicken. Yum Yum Yum, Delicioso! 

Home made appetizers for the win!

So what if it came in a box from the store?

I had to carefully unwrap the box, arrange the pieces in a pan and bake it in my oven. It doesn't get anymore "home made" than that joor. Scratch "made from scratch". *adjusts chef hat*

One of my friends thinks I'm crazy because when I'm hungry, I like to look at pictures of food. It gives me pleasure, especially if it's food I already ate. I feel like I'm breaking the "you can't eat your cake and have it" rule. *cheeky grin*

I like breaking rules. Tell me I can't do something and I immediately find myself trying to figure out just how I can get away with doing it. Explains why I got into a lot of trouble as a child... Yeah, that and my big mouth... My aunty used to call me "Radio Lagos". If only talking was an Olympic sport... 

Do you like to look at pictures of food too, or do you, like my friend, think I'm only punishing myself? 

I would like to know what you think.

Thanks for coming by again and again.

May your dreams come true

xxx

Labor Day Weekend :)

Labor day weekend was fabulous. We had a proper dinner date for the first time since we moved here. 

Not having anyone to babysit, we've had to make do with lunch dates and movies while the munchkins are at daycare. Going out to eat with them is fun, but I don't need to be a mind reader to know that the other diners (who are gracious enough to smile after having had pieces of food thrown at them) and the people who have to clean up after us don't like us very much.

You can imagine how excited I was when Dooshima offered to babysit when she was around. I'm so grateful to her. She's really great with them, and knowing they were in good hands, we were able to  relax and have a great time.

Dinner. 

At the movies :D  We saw Sparkle. Whitney Houston is/was such an amazing actress. I doubt that there was a dry eye when she sang "His Eye Is On The Sparrow". 

It was a fun weekend, we enjoyed having Dooshima around. We had a Crawfish feast. Fun times!

Alexis loves Aunty :D

Debola and Dooshima doing justice to the Crawfish 

See the serious looks on their faces? Figuring out how to eat Crawfish is not a joke at all o. Just yesterday, I was tweeting about how I need to learn how to eat Crawfish in public without looking like a village girl. I ended up spending a good chunk of what was supposed to be Study Time watching YouTube videos of how to eat Crawfish. I had a good laugh. You should look them up. Jokes for days...

Thankfully, I didn't laugh and forget why I turned on my laptop in the first place. I was feeling like a good girl, taking my online English Composition quiz which I thought was due  on Thursday  on Monday night. Imagine my relief when I found out it was closing at 8am on Tuesday. I would've been so pained, especially because it was really easy. We had 45 minutes for three attempts and I only needed one attempt and 5 minutes to get a 10/10 score. Yeah, I'm showing off *dusts shoulders off* Lol... School's cool ;)

Thanks for coming by again and again
May your dreams come true
xxx

First day of school :)

It's been crazy these past couple of weeks. Crazy good.

Nathan got into the Head Start program this year and we're really glad because it's perfect for his transition from  a faith based pre-school to Elementary school when he turns 5 next year. He wasn't picked last year and even though there was a long waiting list, he made it. God keeps showing up for us and we are so grateful.

See how excited my baby is?

He's been looking forward to "real school" all summer. I tried explaining to him that Kindergarten doesn't start until next year, but as far as he's concerned, not going to his regular daycare for pre-k 4 is "real school". Why rain on his parade? 

                           

He's wearing his "I will make history" shirt :) 

As other kids cried and clung to their moms, I was pretty chuffed to see him so independent. The tears we had to wipe were those of Alexis'. She didn't see why she couldn't stay.

She had already claimed her own seat in his class :')

As I watched them, I was reminded of how blessed I am. I do not take God's blessings for granted. This  verse of scripture expresses my heart's desire. I don't ever want to lose sight of how important my job as a mom is as I pursue my dreams.

I have no greater joy than to hear that my children walk in truth.                   3 John 1:4                     

My first day of school
Unlike Nathan, my first day day of school started off pensive. Thankfully, it didn't stay that way and I tweeted this picture in the middle of my first class. Teacher was teaching, Gbemi was tweeting. See my life? :P

By the time classes were over, I was sure that going back to school was the right choice. I wasn't afraid anymore. Errr.. that is not entirely true... I'm still afraid of Algebra. So afraid, I didn't register for any math courses this semester at all. The fear is reeeeaaaallll!!!!

In the weeks leading up to resumption, I was afraid. Thankfully, all that fear served a good purpose. My fear drove me to my knees and as I took time to reflect and ask God for direction, I closely examined my career choices and realized that while Fashion Merchandising was a good career option, I wasn't passionate about it. It was familiar and wouldn't be hard to study, but as I tried to answer the question:

"what would you be doing if financial reward wasn't an issue?" 

I knew I wouldn't pick fashion. I would not do it for free.

What I would do, which I am already doing for free and which I absolutely love, is being there to listen and offer encouragement when people share their cares and concerns about love and marriage. It gives me a lot of pleasure to see people find love and to see marriages thrive, especially if the couple had given up before. Watching God restore marriages, praying along with those who need it and just sowing seeds of love. I love researching possible solutions to issues, so that I can do more than pray or say "it is well". If you follow me on twitter, you already know I can go on and on and on, talking about love, God's way. I have since been named "Aunty Ifesowapo" by Atoke. @gbemisoke is a Love Ambassador. No shame. I often get DMs and Emails with requests for prayers, questions or advice and I find myself carrying burdens of people I barely know because I have come to realize that beneath the strong facades we try to put up, we are all the same, we want to love and be loved. The reason a lot of people suffer in silence is that we think our problems are exclusive to us, so we plaster on our practiced smiles and say "it is well". Jesus did not die for us to endure such pain. I am not ashamed to say that I struggle too. I have issues, questions, imperfections and it bothers me when I cannot do more than pray. I like searching for answers and I love to share them.

I have since changed my major and I'm studying to become a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. A Psychology degree is a requirement for a Masters in MFT, which I need to be licensed to practice. I studied Business Administration back home, so I'm doing Psychology first. It's going to take me so much longer to finish school, but I don't mind at all. I'm so passionate about love and how to make it work, I don't mind putting in all the years of study, just so that I can move beyond empathy to helping people find solutions. One part of me thinks I'm crazy. Debola is convinced I am on the right path and he has been very supportive, patiently listening as I went on and on (and on and on and on), trying to clarify the random thoughts in my head, praying with me as I asked God what He really wants me to do with my life, and just being there... I do not take all of that for granted. Having a supportive partner is such a great blessing.

When the day comes that I am weary, I will come back to this post and hopefully, I will be reminded of this joy and immense sense of gratitude that I feel and I will find the strength to keep going, to keep smiling as I did on the first day of school :)

I've stopped taking on sewing projects so that I can focus on my family and school for now and I'm hoping that as soon as I settle properly into this "adult education" thing, I'll  be able to blog more.

Thanks for coming by again and again,
May your dreams come true
xxx

ImproVacation Day 2

Wassssuuuuup people!!!

*cartwheels across the room* 

I'm in a very good mood! You can tell, right? Yesssss I am :D :D

Day 3 of our improvised vacation (improVacation) wrapped up nicely and I am in avery happy place. We saw an awwwwwww inducing, movie about an older couple trying to get the spark back into their marriage today. Hope Springs, starring Meryll Streep and Tommy Lee Jones. Lots of lessons I'll share with you later. This post is about yesterday. Day 2.

I posted this pic on Twitter on our way to the movies yesterday and my head is still swelling from the compliments. Y'all know I have no shame when it comes to getting positive feedback :D :D My sister's husband said it is obvious that I have been "revitalized" since The Hubs got back. See my life? So I have been "devitalized" since abi? It's true though. He just has a way of "gingering my swagger" lol. It's obvious I'm high. Very high.

It's all good. Y'all know that Jesus is coming soon right? Yes He is, and since there's no marriage in heaven, my plan is to maximize the moment and "chop the life of my head" as I faithfully obey His command to "occupy" till He comes. Can I get an AMEN?! ;;)

We saw The Amazing Spiderman in 3D. I felt like a teenager, sneaking popcorn into the movies. We're no fans of sodium loaded movie popcorn, so we  popped our own kettle corn at home. You should have seen us squealing and giggling as we reached out to touch the web Spiderman shot at us... fun times :D

Did I mention that I got us the movie tickets for free? Yeah! I collected promo codes from cereal boxes and exchanged them for movie tickets online. The buzz I got was just >>>> Look out for me on Extreme Couponing soon ;)

We did Japanese cuisine after. Chicken and Shrimp Teriyaki. Yum yum yum. And the number one enemy of my waistline, ice cream from MarbleSlab. Counting calories is not permitted when you're on holiday, so zero guilt.


These past couple of days have been extra special, perhaps cos this whole "ImproVacation" The Hubs came up with has a big lesson in it for me. Real life, the way things are for me right now and perhaps you too, can be crazy, unpredictable, refusing to go according to plan, but we have a choice. We can complain about how nothing seems to be going our way and make ourselves (and those around us) miserable, or we can choose to make the best of it and have a great time if we take our eyes off what's not working and remember to be thankful for what is.

"A cheerful heart brings a smile to your face; 
   a sad heart makes it hard to get through the day."
                                        Proverbs 15:19 

The most inexpensive holiday of my life has turned out to be the best by far. I am grateful for an amazing man, who is teaching me to make the best of what life brings. Steady helping me become a better person. Leading by example.

I celebrate you, Adebola. When I count my blessings, I count you twice.

Three hearty cheers for my "Chairman"

Gbosa! 

Gbosa!! 

Gbosa!!! 

I'm laughing so hard,there are tears in my eyes. I am one grateful girl. I owe it all to God. He has blessed me more than I deserve. If you're believing Him for a miracle, I join my faith with yours. He will bring His word to pass in your life. Did I hear you say Amen?

Thanks for coming by again and again.
May your dreams come true
xxx

ImproVacation

Every vacation plan we made this year refused to happen.

We had planned to go to South Africa and I was really looking forward to it cos my sister and her husband were going to meet up with us there, but thanks to our time share and the S.A. embassy, no joy. They got there today and it's taking all the willpower I have not to be sad.

I really really needed a break, especially after 11 weeks of being in zombie mode when The Hubs was out of town, so I asked his cousin if she could have the munchkins sleepover at hers for one night. She offered to take them for two and I was so excited, our bags were packed by Tuesday morning, even though we were not scheduled to leave till Wednesday.

Unfortunately, she cancelled on Tuesday night. There was a stomach bug going around and they weren't feeling well. I was so disappointed, I switched to I-want-to-move-back-home-mode. All I wanted was to wake up in a room that wasn't mine and not have to think about the kids for 48 hours.

The Hubs offered to stay back and let me go for the two days, but I declined. The holiday I had planned in my head included having lots and lots of bedroom activity, so going without him was out of the question. Sad sad sad. Until he came up with the improvised vacation idea, which I have named ImproVacation :D. We're home, the kids too, but I'm on holiday. I'm being spoiled silly and I love it. I could get used to this. It's been a lot of fun. My super hero came to the rescue :D:D:D

Day 1: Mediterranean buffet. At the restaurant The Hubs kept commenting on the interior... Columns, beams, stuff architects talk about... All I could think of was the food. Baked fish, kebab... *deep sigh*....  Thinking about all that food is making me hungry. I'm off to grab something to eat and I'll be back to tell you about day 2.


After the movie. We saw Total Recall and loved it !

What can I get for a rib?

This cracked me up and I thought I'd share it with you.

One day, Adam was feeling lonely. 

God: Adam, you need a partner. To take care of you, cook for you, bear you children, never argue with you or nag, she'll agree with every decision you make and when you disagree, she'll be the first to say she's wrong. 

Adam: what will this cost me? 

God: an arm an a leg.

 Adam: What can I get for a rib? 

The rest is history... 

WOW!!

WOW!!

What if he's attracted to someone else?

Yay!!

I did my first video today and I am sooooo excited :D :D :D

What do you think about this statement?

"A good woman isn't concerned with her man's friends of the opposite sex and a good man doesn't give her reason to be."

Someone tweeted this and I didn't agree. This led to an interesting debate and at the end, Joy asked me what I would do if my "Boobokins",  as my husband is fondly called, was attracted to another woman?

I promised her a blogpost that answers that question and then I thought, how about a video? I have been meaning to do one for a while, but between procrastination, not knowing what an appropriate topic would be, and not knowing how to work the video thing, it never happened, well, until today.

I tried and tried to keep the video short, just so you wouldn't get bored. I didn't cover everything I would've liked to say and I would be glad to throw more light if you have any questions.

Please share your thoughts...
xxx

Simple. Err... Not so simple

5 steps to becoming great.

10 keys to achieving your dreams.

3 things you must do to be happy.

We are bombarded with so much information, yet not much is changing. We keep going round in circles.

Stop.
Think.
What's the point of all this learning with no doing. It's time to act on what we are learning.

"Fear God. Do what He tells you." 

Simple. Err... Not so simple, but you catch my drift ;o)

Loving the unlovable. Tall order.

This scripture has been on my mind all day.

 I like the way The Message Version puts it.

I have been thinking about the implications of living like Jesus instructs us to in this scripture and I can see that I have a looooooong way to go. Can I really live like this? Steady loving people who hurt me? I wish I could confidently say yes, but...

What Jesus is asking of us goes against our human nature. It's a tall order. Thankfully, He has promised to help us as we walk with Him. I'm taking this challenge and asking for His help. Wanna come along?

TEARJERKERS

Sappy. 

That's me. It doesn't take a lot to get me teary eyed and now that I can blog on the go, I'll share my TEARJERKERS, as I call them, with you. 

SECRET MILLIONAIRE.

I can't watch this show without crying. Every week, a millionaire leaves his comfy life and goes undercover to an impoverished area, working with organizations that help disadvantaged people. Pretending to be filming a documentary on volunteering, he works with them for a week, at the end of which he reveals his identity and writes them a check. Touching stuff. 

Today's millionaire, Jeff, goes just 30mins away from his opulent side of town to run-down San Anantonio, Texas. He volunteers with Team Ability, a learning center that teaches parents the skills they need to help their children with profound disabilities. Orlando, a 13 year old who suffers from Cerebral Palsy is one of their patients. His mum is such a positive person, describing her son as "a blessing", she said "I feel God doesn't give us more than we can handle and I believe He gave him to me for a reason". Tearing up, she said "I couldn't ask for more, caring for Him is rewarding" 

Wow!! 

What a positive outlook to life. Jeff, the millionaire, was in tears. He said "God's placed something in her that is not in me." Watching her being so grateful, even with a child that's wheelchair bound who needs round the clock care, I'm reminded that I have a lot to learn from her and lots to be thankful for. They went to their home to deliver a home made learning center and the look on the boy's face... Wow!! Orlando's dad, Ross, who had never been to any of his therapy sessions cos he has to work long hours, broke down in tears. Tough guy.

He gave Team Ability $40,000. Now they can help so many more low-income high-need families. He also gave this group that teaches boxing to help kids build their self esteem and keep them off the streets $35,000. He gave Habitat for Safe Seniors, a group that helps provide groceries for older people $85,000! See tears on tears on tears.. There wasn't a single dry eye.

Being able to help others, especially when they can't give you anything back has to be the bestest feeling ever. You might not be able to pay them back, but how about we all decide to pay it forward?

So, Has anyone ever helped you like this? Wanna share?

UPDATE
You can watch this episode on the ABC website here

Blingin' and Countin'

This is my first post using blogger mobile. I just found out today that I can blog via MMS, SMS or email and I'm so excited! Yay!! /\--0 (that's me dancing, doing the "komole")

I love love love the idea that I can blog the many random thoughts in my head on the spur of the moment. Move over, side chick (Twitter), I'm back with my true love (Blogger) ;) 

I made this dress last week, but I wasn't satisfied cos I thought it needed a little "oomph", so last night, I blinged it up and I love it now. I hope my client likes it too. I'll show you the dress after she comes to pick it up if she let's me.

The munchkins kept hovering, wanting to play with the beads and stones and I kept chasing them away. "Arrrggghh! Go watch TV!! I'm busy!!" Stamping his feet, Nathan cried, "I'm not mummy's friend because she won't let me play". One look at his sulking face sent me on the " is-work-more-important-than-your-children?" guilt trip and in no time, we were learning our shapes and counting :)

A lot of the time, it's exasperating. I've had to get out of bed three times in the past 20 or so minutes to put Alexis back in her bed, for example. I'm nothing like the mums on TV who have it all together. I struggle, trying to keep up with all three of them without dropping the ball in other areas of my life. I don't know how I'll cope when I start school this Fall. I'll probably have to stop sewing...

In all of this, I can still find lots to be thankful for. I see God's hands steering the course of my life and even though I don't understand all of it, I'm one very grateful girl :) I faved this tweet by Rick Warren tonight.                                                                

@RickWarren: TRUST is allowing God to interrupt your schedule without you complaining. 

 Is your schedule being interrupted? How are you staying thankful? Please share. You could be helping someone :)

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 Mic check. 1. 2. 3. Testing. Testing. Testing.

:) Fear not guys... I'm trying out posting via MMS. Hope it works *fingers crossed*

Side Chick. Prayer Challenge.

I am half asleep, but this post must go up tonight!

My friend, Aloted, started a prayer challenge, IPray4U, on her blog and I would like to invite you to join in.
It's simple. You write the names of seven people and pray for one of them each day. You can read more about it on her Purpose Driven Blog Please join in if you can :o)

Since my last post, I haven't been able to stop thinking about love and how complicated it gets. Time after time, I have come here, attempting to put down my thoughts down, but all those posts have ended up as drafts because I usually end up with more questions than answers.


Twitter is the new side chick that's keeping me away from my loyal first love, Blogger. Just the other day, I posted these tweets:

 

I find it easier to tweet than blog these days, so you might want to follow @Gbemisoke , and if you're not on twitter, what can I say? You're probably more productive than I am, seeing as from my experience, twitter is simultaneously the most useful and useless social network ever.

What has been your experience with twitter? Care to share?

Now let's see if I can keep my newly rekindled love for Blogger fresh by attempting to flesh out a couple of those posts still in draft. 

Thanks for coming by,

May your dreams come true

xoxo

Divorce or Death? Choose.

10:47pm. 5/5/12


My head hurts. My heart too. 


I caught this story on TV as I was prepping the munchkins for bed. Today, 5/5/12 is the three year anniversary of the murder of Sheri Coleman and her two sons, Garett and Gavin. Chris Coleman, husband and father of the deceased, was found guilty of the triple murder exactly a year ago. You can read the full story here. It's long, so I'll break it down.


Chris, 32, had been married to 31 year old Sheri for 12 years. They met when they were both in the military and she had become a stay at home mom. He worked as head of security for Joyce Meyer ministries and had reported to the police that he had started to get death threats to his family from unknown persons, asking him to "tell Joyce to stop preaching the bull" or get killed.


Turns out he had been having an affair with Tara, his wife's best friend from high school, for about 6 months. He had been flying her to meet him at various locations where he was working for Joyce Meyer. They had accounts and credit cards together, planned wedding dates  and had picked out names for their yet to be conceived daughter. He had told Tara that he was serving divorce papers to Sheri on May 5th, the day the murders occurred. They had been sexting and he had promised Tara he would leave Sheri for her. When asked in court if they had been planning to get married, Tara replied, "The divorce had to happen first". She had been putting pressure on him to end his marriage.

Sheri found out about the affair. She showed her friend pictures of Tara, telling her in tears that if anything ever happened to her, "Chris did it". He had asked her for a divorce and threatened her, but Sheri wouldn't let him go. They were going for counselling, but he would put up an act in front of the counselor and flip on her when they were alone, telling her he never loved her and never should have married her. He couldn't initiate the divorce because it could cost him his job. In a video deposition, Joyce Meyer confirmed this. "If he would have been having an adulterous affair, while he was still married, then it could have definitely affected his job," said Meyer. 

On the outside, they looked perfect. Their neighbor said "I always thought of them as the American family, the perfect family". According to this report, on the night before he killed his wife and kids, "Chris Coleman went to the gym and came home to put the boys to bed. They brushed their teeth and said their prayers. he watched a movie downstairs with Sheri. She fell asleep in his arms. Chris Coleman was also texting his girlfriend that night, while he was at the gym and even as he was in the same room with his wife"


He was trapped. He wanted out, his wife wouldn't set him free. His mistress had given him an ultimatum, so he put a plan in place, sending emails to himself to make it seem like someone was planning to hurt his family, getting the police to set up cameras and sneaking in to strangle her with a cord and killing his sons as well just so he could be free. In a recent interview from prison, he insists that he is innocent. He said he was having the affair because he wasn't "getting what I thought I...should be getting at home...from the physical side of things". 

Read more here: http://www.bnd.com/2011/04/27/1685887/colemans-had-dinner-watched-movie.html#storylink=cpy

source

Hmmm...
As usual, I started to look for the lessons in this story and it threw up a lot of questions. Thankfully, (and I say this with immense gratitude to God because I know it is not because I am good or smart or holy) I am not in this situation. But I know people who are. Smiling, answering "fine, we thank God" or "it is well" when asked "how are you?". Women (and men, believe it or not) with spouses who would rather not be with them and have expressed this either directly, or indirectly by acting in a manner that suggests so.


I am writing this post not because I have answers, but I know there is a wealth of knowledge you, reading this right now can bring to the table.


Is a spouse required to stay?


Personally, I have made God's word the final authority over my life, so that's where I went first. God hates divorce. I do not like it too for several reasons. 


Having divorce as an option has been said to greatly reduce the chances of a marriage being successful. We are more likely to make plan A work when we hit a bump in the road without a plan B. Also, divorce hurts children. I know many well balanced people that are products of marriages that ended in divorce, but I know that divorce leaves its scars. There's also our culture. I am Nigerian and generally, women are seen as failures when their marriages do not succeed. It is common to hear that a woman did not "keep her home". I have never heard a man being spoken about like that.


This is why I really need your help. What is a woman to do if her husband does not want her anymore. What if it just isn't working? In this case, we don't know if he abused her physically, but he abused her emotionally. He told her "I don't love you anymore". Was her decision to hold on to him because she didn't have options, being a stay at home mum and all... Question questions and more questions.

*sigh* It's 11:59 and I'm still here... I need to go. The Hubs is waiting up for me. I don't know if I have expressed what's on my heart well, but my hope is that maybe, just maybe, someone would read it and be saved from Sheri's fate.

I really should go over it for typos though...

Okay, It's now 1:43am and I'm still not done. Three hours... Longest post I've ever written (I think).

Please be kind enough to share your thoughts. Feel free to be anonymous if you want to share personal stuff. 

Thanks for always stopping by.

May your dreams come true

xoxo

My Messy Lil' Miracle :o)

Been a while....

I've come here time and again, attempting to put up a post, but the words have eluded me.

This is me making another attempt.

Lots of things have happened since my last post. Many good things, some not so good ones, a few scary ones and one very horrible one...  Someday, I'll be able to talk of the lessons I have learned, but until then, I'm learning to focus on the things I have going for me and to stay thankful. All things are working together for my good. This work in progress is... well, in progress, I guess *chuckles*

I had a birthday, Nathan turned four, The Hubs has been around for a while*big cheesy grin*, Alexis turns 2 in a few weeks, David turns six months in a few days... God has been kind to me.

Ever had a moment when the most random event teaches you a remarkable life lesson? I had one recently and I haven't been able to stop thinking about it.

David (my Lil' Miracle) is teething. I know I still haven't shared that "Lil' Miracle" story I promised *covers face* I'll get to it soon enough, I promise :o)

So, Lil' Miracle has itchy gums and tries to put everything in his mouth. I got him some Farley's Rusks and he loves them. I should be happy right? He's chewing on something that's good for him, buying a whole box wasn't a waste.... Well, I wasn't. This is why

He "over loved" the rusks. Stuff was in his hair, on his socks, the car seat was messed up. aaaarrrghhh!! Who has time to clean up after all this? As if I don't have enough on my plate already!! I had to give him a bath afterwards and as I put the box of rusks on the shelf, I made up my mind NEVER to give him any more.... then I heard the still small voice...

 "What would happen if I refused to let you enjoy things just because of the mess I would have to clean up after?"

*Sigh*. I just became humble... What was I feeling like? Miss too-busy-to-give-her-baby-a-bath. I'm learning to stay grateful for the many blessings in my life that money cannot buy.
Love. Life. Laughter. Family. Friends. Good health. Salvation.

I'm off to my Zumba class and as I dance and work my body to the red hot dance steps, I'll remember to be thankful that even though I've got a "chinese-flat" bum, i can still shake it ;o)

What are you grateful for? Please share and let's remind ourselves of how blessed we are.

Thanks for coming again and again.
May your dreams come true
xoxo

Three fitness trainers for this one girl!!!

Hello  beautiful people!!!

Abandoning my place in space was not the plan at all... You know how much I love the positive energy you all bring to my life. Every time I read your kind comments, I'm reminded that I am not alone, and that feeling warms my heart :o) Thank you.

I've had a lot of new visitors here since I had the pleasure of kicking off the Love Chronicles series over at The Soul Sistas blog. I share the hubby and I's "how-we-met" story there. You might want to check it out if you haven't read it yet. Sharing with everyone who contacted me with questions after they read the interview has shown me that behind our facades, we are all the same. We yearn to love and be loved. It is such a joy to know that God wants to help us find it. Love is indeed a beautiful thing.

So much has been happening... My life is all kinds of crazy... Crazy good though, not crazy bad *chuckles*... A beautiful mix of highs and lows... I can't complain. I am grateful. I feel blessed and lucky.

So many different things come up in this movie that is my life, I constantly feel a need to let off steam. One reason I haven't been blogging though, is that I have a hard time figuring out where to draw the line between venting and complaining.

The other day, I got downstairs to see that Nathan and Alexis had emptied a pack of oats all over the living room floor. I sent them to their room, worrying about the side effects of eating raw oats as I cleaned up the mess they had made. Imagine my frustration on getting upstairs to see that they had emptied a whole tube of hand lotion all over my toothbrush and theirs as they attempted to brush their teeth! Besides the extra work they kept giving me, how was I to know how much lotion (and only God knows what else) they had ingested?!  AAARRRGHH!!!  As I was getting worked up, thinking "what kind of children are these"?! I started to think about how grateful I should be. I know people who would gladly trade places with me just for the chance to be called mummy... *sigh* That right there is the dilemma I face on the regular these days. Yes I am grateful, but I feel guilty when I vent/complain/rant. I tell myself to suck it up and quit being so dramatic.  Perhaps you're reading this and have it all figured out. I would love to learn if you would be kind enough to share.

Another angle is the "awww" "eeeyah" and "sorry" feedback I get. Especially when I talk about my parents and sister that have gone to be with the Lord. You see, I bring them up a lot cos I'm afraid not talking about them would make me forget them, and the memories we made. Slowly but surely, it is happening... memories fade...I don't want to forget. I want to keep their memories alive. When I talk about them though, I get the "eeyah, poor Gbemi" vibe, which I don't like... The whole point of venting is not to be pitied. I don't want pity. I hate playing the victim. Everybody is going through stuff of their own. I don't want to be the girl that carries her issues around like an albatross. We all know that one person that always has a sob story... nah, I so do not want to be her.

One really great thing about keeping up with the munchkins is all that exercise. I have convinced myself that wearing my workout clothes as I work the vacuum cleaner with one hand and balance David on my hip with the other burns more calories than the treadmill. Meet my fitness trainers Nathan Ademide, Alexis Ademidun and David Ademidara. Don't let their smiles fool you. Jillian Michaels has got nothing on them :o)

Thanks for dropping by yet again.
May your dreams come true
xxx